Current Weight: 203.6 lbs (+0.6 lbs from last week)
Work Out Achievement(s): I woke up feeling a bit bloated this morning so I waited until that subsided (and a trip to the ladies room) before weighing in. In all honesty, besides my inner revelation this weekend my week had been pretty stressful.
You see I've been mentioning here and there about a life changing decision I've been going back and forth over for the last week or so. The reason for so much stress was that no matter what I chose I was going to be letting someone down. There was no win-win in the scenario. Someone was bound to lose and I hated to see that happen but I had to make a decision.
And I did. My decision (and this might be anti-climatic but it's a big deal for me) was to leave my current summer position here in Mammoth, "leave the beautiful mountains Elina?? No! Why?" to work as a Summer Naturalist in Catalina Island.
The reason why it was killing me to do this was because I know that the people I work with now really need the help (and I in turn need them to teach me what they know so that I can finally have a better idea on what I want to study in grad school) but this new position will help me gain skills for the CAREER I'm planning on pursuing. Two things that don't necessarily correlate and I had to make a choice.
Because I have a more clear idea of my career choices than my education choices I decided to go with the one I felt more confident about.
The reason I didn't feel comfortable revealing this was because I had to find a way to break it to my current employers first, find a solution that will pad the blow of me leaving, and do it all without bursting in to tears in front of them. (I am NOT kidding here. It was heart-wrenching.)
The point of all this, as you might or might not guess, is that my eating habits were far from strict last week.
I finally made my decision on Wednesday. I delivered the news that same day to my crew.
On Thursday I went out to dinner and completely gulped up a Giant Duck burrito (I know, a Duck burrito, weird right? But very tasty, and very HUGE!) a margarita, and a ton of chips and salsa.
Let's just say my stomach was so expanded and full that night I couldn't sleep and kept moaning in discomfort,
"Ugh! Sooo fulll!"
hours after the meal.
On Friday I had chocolate chocolate and more chocolate. And finally had a chance to really explain myself to my boss (barely restraining myself from falling on my knees, bursting in to tears and begging for forgiveness by reminding myself that I *needed* to make this choice and that I shouldn't have to grovel for making a decision that will --hopefully-- lead me to a better life). And because everything was finally out on the table my mood and stress lifted and lead me to:
Saturday, my day of Inner Peace. I would not have been able to have such a revelation if it hadn't been for my de-stressing conversation the night before. But I suppose my body still needed re-assuring because my food choices were not the healthiest, although my actions were. I would call it a balanced day.
Yesterday, (Sunday) I indulged in more chocolate and peanut butter.
But this morning I saw my weight. I was bummed I hadn't lost anything and I knew that my actions weren't the greatest so this morning
(and yes this entire commentary lead to this one little thing. If you know me personally you shouldn't be surprised at my ability to go off on tangents for minutes and minutes before getting to the point, so for those of you who don't know me.. now you do. LOL)
I decided to finally "get serious" and doubled my running distance. I told myself enough was enough and that I really needed to stop limiting myself so this morning I jogged 4 miles instead of two. So here are the numbers:
1 mile in 14 minutes
2 miles in 28 minutes
4 miles in 56 minutes.
I kept it at my steady pace to not over tire myself and was happy to see my timing was consistent. Of course this is probably the slowest 4 miles in history but I'm just happy I kept it under an hour. Yay me!
Goal(s): So now that I have a new plan and a much sooner deadline I'm making plans to check out the pool and make a stricter work out schedule. Again I haven't been tracking my food and I have no excuses left so I will make a point to blog my final calorie intake nightly for this entire week and hope that I will finally lose the last few pounds and get myself in gear for August.
Thank you for sticking with me so far. Turns out this year, "The Year of Risk Taking" is turning out to be more interesting (and stressful) than I anticipated.
Have you ever had to make a "fork in the road" decision that (might have) changed your life? How do you think it turned out? Let me know. I'm really interested.